All The Ways
by LeggyLulu
Summary: This is a story of scenarios...think of it as drabbles, but longer. I'm going to pretty much post all the one-shots I've written and also write more. Next Up: Comparing Scars in which Merlin gets drunk and takes off his shirt
1. Merlin Loses His Temper

**So, I've been waiting to try my hand at a new story _all_ semester. Now that yucky school is over I can proceed with this new plan.**

**Summary/Idea: This is a fic intended to resemble the whole "drabble" concept that everyone is having so much fun with. However, these will not be drabbles in terms of length because they will definitely be longer than 100 words or whatever. I am going to post one-shots here and they are going to be random, weird, and odd...at least some of them. I do not intend to continue any of them right now, and if it is a continuation of a previous episode, I will note it for all to see. Also, if you, as an author, are inspired by one of my "drabbles" please let me know so I can read it. **

**WARNING: Ha, none really...if there are any T chapters I will say so before the story. Also, no slash in this one at all, so no worries if you're thinking its going to pop up somewhere. Aaaaand, I think that's it. I don't own Merlin**

**Okay, so here's a normal one to start you guys off. Don't want to scare anyone away *evil grin***

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><p><span>Merlin Loses His Temper<span>

To say Arthur was in a foul mood was an understatement.

He was positively glowering lately, constantly moody, rude, and unreasonable.

Like always, it seemed, he was taking his hurt and anger over what had transpired with Gwenivere out on Merlin.

Merlin was also feeling the loss of one of his best friends, which Arthur didn't even consider when he practically bit off his manservant's head for muttering a simple, "I miss her too Arthur."

To say Merlin was hurt and angry was also an understatement.

The young warlock tried to understand and sympathize with Arthur, and he tried not take the insults personally; something he was usually able to do.

What Merlin failed to consider was that in constantly bowing to Arthur's needs, he was effectively bottling up his own.

And this whole mess had left Merlin pretty upset.

In fact, he was very, _very_ angry. He was angry at himself for not being able to stop Lancelot, he was angry that he had again, underestimated Morgana's determination to harm Camelot in _whatever_ way possible, and he was also angry at Agravaine, for being such a traitorous and cunning arse to his only nephew. Merlin was also angry at Arthur, because Arthur _always_ listened to Agravaine instead of him.

Merlin was also incredibly sad.

He had lost Gwen, and he had also had to say goodbye to Lancelot, _again_. He was feeling depressed and miserable, just like Arthur, but he couldn't share his feelings at all because he had to hide behind this falsely cheery façade that even he was hard-pressed to keep up now.

To Merlin, it seemed like he was losing. It felt like all these years of subtly trying to change Arthur into a decent human being and a great king were amounting to nothing. In the face of Morgana and Agravaine's manipulations, it felt like Arthur was going backwards, and there wasn't anything Merlin could do to stop it.

So maybe that's why that day on the training field, a few days after Gwen's banishment, when Arthur and the other knights had finished beating Merlin up for the moment and were drinking water, and everyone was being quiet because no one wanted to say anything to upset the King, Merlin had innocently stated, "Everything is going to be okay."

Merlin had felt like he had needed to say it as much as Arthur needed to hear it. Merlin hadn't meant for anyone else to hear it, but his ears were ringing and he didn't judge his volume correctly.

Arthur had blown back with, "What the _hell_ do you know Merlin? How could you ever begin to understand? Just shut up."

Arthur had said these things to Merlin before, but even the other knights looked a little shocked at the anger and malice the words carried.

And maybe it was because of the situation; maybe it was because of the irony. Maybe it was because what Arthur had just said sounded almost exactly like what someone else had said to him years ago in the depths of Camelot, telling him he couldn't _possibly understand_.

If Merlin had been himself, and this had been another day, he would have understood that Arthur hadn't meant it. He would have borne the insult and just kept his mouth shut.

But this wasn't another day, and Merlin _wasn't_ himself.

The part inside Merlin's mind where he kept his patience, his logic, and his real personality exploded in a burst, carrying with it the long overdue need to literally punch some sense into Arthur. However, the rational part of Merlin's brain knew that a physical assault against Arthur would probably fail, so he settled for the alternative.

Merlin threw the shield down on the grass, removed his helmet and threw that down as well. His eyes were furious and his fists were curled tight to his sides.

"Don't talk to me like that." Merlin said quietly, his voice just loud enough for Arthur to hear.

Everyone paused, and Arthur slowly turned back, his eyes showing mild surprise.

"Excuse me?" He questioned slowly, enunciating every word, intending to convey to Merlin that he needed to backtrack, fast.

"Don't treat me like I'm an idiot." Merlin continued, his voice louder, his eyes stubbornly meeting Arthur's gaze.

"I know that's how you see me, how you all see me." Merlin practically shouted.

"To you I'm this bumbling fool who couldn't possibly know anything about anything! Just because I'm not a warrior and I can't use a sword doesn't make me stupid, and you know what? I notice more than any of you. I'm always right too, but no one ever listens to me until its too late. I warned _you_ all about the Lamia didn't I?" Merlin said, turning to Gwaine, Elyan, Perceval and Leon, his voice getting even louder.

"We were under a spell." Leon replied quickly, his voice defensive and angry. He couldn't believe Merlin was addressing them this way.

The others too, Perceval, Gwaine, and Elyan, were not accustomed to this kind of talk from Merlin, because they were Knights of Camelot and he was just a servant.

"But _I_ wasn't!" Merlin shot back, with a rueful shake of his head, his eyes hard, and his head lifted in confidence.

The other knights weren't his targets though; Merlin motioned towards Arthur

"I told you about Gaius too. I knew he would _never, ever _betray you or Camelot. I knew it better than anything else! And you should have too Arthur, just like you knew in your heart that having King Caerleon killed was wrong. I warned you about that too but instead of trusting me and trusting yourself…" Merlin stopped speaking, his rational common sense stepping in at the last moment to intervene before this tirade turned into something else entirely.

Though Arthur and all the other knights understood that Merlin knew _exactly_ what he had been going to say.

For their part however, they were too surprised to really say anything. It was good too because Merlin wasn't finished. During his pause, Merlin had briefly looked down at the ground, his teeth visibly clenched together and when he looked up again his eyes were softer…pained.

"And don't pretend to know everything about me Arthur. You're not the only one in this world who has lost someone they loved, and you can at least take comfort in the fact that Gwenivere is _alive_." Merlin's voice broke slightly on that last word,

"And someday, when this whole mess has been sorted out, because I don't know if anyone here noticed," Merlin said motioning emphatically,

"But Lancelot was _not_ exactly himself, and if any of _you_ knew _anything_ about magic you would have known that people who have died do not come back to life with their free will in tact, and maybe, just maybe we could all think of _someone_ out there who may not want to see Gwen sitting on the throne as Camelot's Queen. That's just my opinion though, and I know it doesn't count for much. So you can take comfort in the fact that when everything is fixed and back to the way it was always supposed to be, you'll see her again Arthur, and you'll be happy. Not everyone has that luxury." And with those final parting words, Merlin fixed Arthur with the most solemn and grim look the King had ever seen on his manservant's face.

Then Merlin turned away and stalked off the field.

The King and his knights shared looks of equal astonishment, and no one said anything for a long time.

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><p><strong>AN: So...that was just something I thought up when I was having an angry Merlin moment. Honestly, sometimes I wish Merlin would just go <em>off<em> on them all! Especially Arthur, because really, sometimes he just deserves it. However, since that episode I have since fallen back in love with Arthur because he was so awesome in last week's episode. He made me cry and he gave me hope again because I was beginning to think he had turned into a prat again. Also, is it just me or has Arthur been a little harsh to Merlin this season? Just sayin'.**

**Anyway, thats it for this one. Next one is going to be completely random, so be prepared. Should have it up soon.**


	2. The First Slip Up

**Here is my next one-shot. I actually had this worked into maybe another thing...but I don't think its going to happen, at least not right now. I dislike Morgana, to put it mildly...but maybe when season 4 is over I'll go back and try to find those good feelings I had for her. I dunno, we'll see I guess. **

**Review Reply to Jacqs: I agree with everything. You're completely right, I think Merlin should have gotten a bit of a promotion too. And I wish they would give him a little more backbone. He can pull it off, and he deserves it! Thank you for the review.**

**OH HOLY CRAP! I forgot! (Prepare for exclamation points) Does everyone know the names of the last two episodes of season 4? If you don't I'm going to tell you right now because I just found out last night and it made me so excited that I couldn't go to sleep! Okay, ready? Its going to be a two-parter just like last season and the episodes are named (at least according to wikipedia btw) The Sword in the Stone...parts one and two people! I know, I know right? Holy Crow! If you want to squeal to me, please feel free!**

**WARNING: This episode has a tinge of implied Morgana/Merlin...just a little bit though! Not going to tell you more because its a surprise.**

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><p><span>The First Slip-up<span>

The door to the cell was flung open and Tom, the blacksmith rushed inside to embrace his daughter, who had miraculously been pardoned. Gwen had tears in her eyes and turned to the other two people who had believed in her enough to find a way to get her out.

"Thank you!" She said to Morgana in gratitude, clasping the woman's hands in her own.

Morgana was smiling, but she knew who the credit for Gwen's release belonged to,

"Don't thank me, it was more Merlin." She said, shooting him a knowing look which he completely ignored. She could guess how Arthur's new manservant felt about her maid. Especially since she heard how he had barged into the Great Hall, claiming to be the sorcerer who had cured Gwen's father.

He was willing to sacrifice himself for Gwen, and she knew what that meant.

"Really?" Gwen breathed, her attention turning to the young man. She felt her heart flutter at the thought that he had rescued her.

"He's the real hero." Morgana interjected, hoping to further improve Merlin's chances with Gwen.

"I don't know what to say." Gwen replied, her voice breathy with relief.

But Merlin was quick to shrug off the praise, uncomfortable with the way both Gwen and her father were looking at him.

"I didn't do anything." He said.

"Well, I'm grateful to you all. Come on Gwen." Tom said with gratitiude before escorting his daughter out of the cell, the sooner they were out of the dungeons the better.

Then he could really believe that he wasn't going to loose his daughter.

As soon as they left Morgana turned to Merlin, who was also turning to leave. She realized that he must not be ready to admit his feelings and she wanted to let him know that he had her support.

"Merlin," She called softly, he turned to face her,

"I just wanted you to know that your secret is safe with me."

His face became suddenly serious, "My secret?" He asked, pretending to be unaware of what she was talking about.

His mind was racing though.

Had she seen him use magic to defeat the Afanc? Had he really been so careless already? Gaius was going to _kill_ him…

"Come on, don't pretend. I know what you did." She replied, her face entirely serious.

"You do?"

Morgana thought his shocked expression comical, but she managed to keep a strait face.

"I saw it with my own eyes."

"You did?" His voice cracked, and she couldn't help giving him a little grin.

"I understand why you don't want anyone to know."

"Well obviously…"

She could see what Gwen saw in him, she thought absently, he _was_ quite adorable, and his eyes…

"But I won't tell anyone, you don't mind me talking to you about it?" Morgana thought maybe she could try and help them get together. Two such good people deserved to be happy and Gwen had never been this interested in anyone before.

Merlin felt the sweet sensation of relief, Morgana had said she wouldn't tell anyone. Maybe this would be okay, and he could talk to someone besides Gaius about his magic.

"I-I, no, its um, you have no idea how hard it is to keep this hidden." He told her with a grin. Morgana opened her mouth to reply that Gwen was a lucky woman but then…

"I've had to keep this a secret from everyone since before I can remember." Merlin laughed nervously, thinking that she had been about to ask for an explanation.

"I mean, my mother and Gaius know, and one of my friend from Ealdor found out by accident but still…"

Morgana shut her mouth after Merlin's first sentence. It was obvious now that he hadn't known she was talking about Gwen…he couldn't be talking about Gwen.

She should have cut him off, should have told him that she was referring to Gwenivere, but something stopped her.

Morgana wouldn't have thought there was anything different about Merlin until she had heard how he had stood up to Arthur, more than a few times. He had also exposed Knight Valiant even though no one believed him, saving Arthur's life. Then there was that whole business with the Afanc…Merlin had seemed so sure of what was happening. Morgana had of course, assumed that Gaius had told Merlin how to defeat it, but maybe that wasn't so? Besides, twenty years is a long time to keep a secret, and Morgana had always had an insatiable curiosity. So when Merlin paused, she nodded and smiled…waiting for him continue.

"So even though magic is banned in Camelot, my mother sent me to Gaius, hoping he could teach me how to control it. I'm so grate…ful." Merlin trailed off when he saw the growing look of alarm on Morgana's face.

Shock and astonishment was all Morgana was feeling right now, and for all her gifts of concealment _nothing_ could have been as surprising as learning that Merlin had magic.

Merlin noted the look, and his pale face got paler, his heart suddenly sounding in his ears.

"Uh, you didn't- you didn't uh, know that did you?" Merlin asked in a whisper, unable to keep his voice from shaking. Morgana shook her head in that slow way that told Merlin just how much he had surprised her.

"Oh, God…" Merlin muttered under his breath. From somewhere, far away, he acknowledged that he was either going to have to flee Camelot or he was going to lose his head. All he could see right now though, was Morgana's face.

"Merlin…you have- _magic_?" She whispered the last word, a little harshly he thought. He looked at her, his lips pursed in contemplation. He could lie to her…try and save his neck, but really, what would be the point?

So he stood up straighter and his eyes glinted at her, and in that moment she felt like she was seeing the real Merlin. His blue eyes bored into her as he faced her, took a deep breath and said the words she had hoped he wouldn't say.

"Yes, my lady. I have magic."

And then she realized that all these years Uther had been right when he told her that curiosity killed the cat. Her gaze, still locked with Merlin's was starting to affect her, something deep inside was responding to his presence, connecting them in a way where Morgana knew nothing would ever be the same.

Well, she thought humorously, still looking into those striking blue eyes, if curiosity killed the cat…that death was a noble one indeed.

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><p><strong>AN: So like I said...possibly a continuation LATER...maybe. Also, hahaha, bet you weren't expecting that right? Summary said be prepared for the unexpected! <strong>


	3. Merlin's Big Mouth

**Has anyone heard of the Merlin movie? You know, the one they're planning to make after the show? Eeep right? And there MAY be a sixth season...if you want the proof chikas, I've got it! You all knew though didn't you? Okay whatever...**

**Guys, I'm loosing hope for a reveal this season :( Damn it all! I'd still love the show! I'd still watch it! They don't have to wait till the end of everything!**

**To my two anonymous reviewers: **

**Nats: Um, thank you SO much for that site! As mentioned above, I'm totally taken with the idea of a movie. Holy crap, two hours of Merlin? Amaaaazing!**

**Magical Moo: Yes I do believe Merlin should have an angry moment. Especially this season...all those moments...ah well, maybe we'll see one eventually. **

**Thank you both for your reviews!**

**Okay...****This is a short one that I wrote a while ago when I was in a mood. **

**WARNINGS: none, none at all ;)**

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><p><span>Merlin's Big Mouth<span>

Merlin burst through the King's chambers, out of breath because he knew he was at _least_ ten minutes late. Arthur was sitting at his desk, going through papers. He looked up at his errant manservant who was actually, fourty minutes late. Merlin grimaced as Arthur's eyes swept over Merlin's face, before they inevitably stopped on his head and lingered there for a few minutes.

Arthur lips pursed slightly, but other than that he kept a rather strait face.

Merlin had a rather abashed expression, his eyes downcast in embarrassment.

Ordinarily, the King would have laughed because really, it was too funny. Today however Arthur was really busy and rather moody, because it was that time of the month for him…his council meeting was today. Arthur had expected his breakfast, and his clothes laid out for him, but of course, Merlin was otherwise _occupied_.

So Arthur took a minute, debating how he was going to…

"Merlin. Why is your hair _blue_?" He finally asked.

Merlin fumbled a little, lifting his hand to twist one of the radiant blue locks around his finger, feigning a position of innocence.

"Uh, um…you see, it was Gaius who-"

But Arthur stopped him, getting up from the table and walking towards his screen to change.

"No you know what, I don't want to know. Just see that it's fixed. You look ridiculous."

Merlin should've left it at that but, well…

"Ha, not nearly as bad as donkey ears though right?"

Silence.

Arthur stopped and turned around slowly, his eyes dangerous.

"Oh come on, your not still sore about that are you? The goblin messed with everyone, not…just…you-"

"Merlin." Arthur spoke through gritted teeth.

"Uh, shut up?"

"No. Run."

Upon seeing absolutely no hint that Arthur was joking, Merlin squeaked and leaped for the door. He turned his head to see that Arthur had started to relax, obviously not intending to go through with his threat, and Merlin couldn't resist.

"I guess even the goblin knew you were an ass."

After a while when Merlin was mucking out the stables with a sore arm, he resolved that Gaius was right, he really did talk too much.

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><p><strong>Haaaaannnnd you guys thought when I said I was in a mood I meant in a bad one. Psych! I was totally trying to be all funny. Let me know if it made you laugh too. Reviews make me very happy.<strong>


	4. Comparing Scars

**Happy New Year everyone! I wanted to post this yesterday but I didn't quite finish it. **

**This will most likely be a two-shot/ three-shot, but its not a cliffy or anything and second part of this probably won't be the next chapter as I am working on a few different ones first. **

**A few authors have done some sort of take on this topic, and I'm adding mine to the list.**

**WARNING: There is a very, mild Season 4 SpoilerAlert! So please don't get angry with me.**

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><p><span>Comparing Scars<span>

"I got this one when I was just learning how to fight. The man who was teaching me accidently got me in the side." Leon was saying, his lips pulled into a smirk of remembrance.

"Alright, well I've got this huge thing right here from when a giant of a man tried to gut me after I beat him at cards." Gwaine countered, his voice slightly muffled because his shirt and chainmail were lifted up, blocking out his face, while his finger pointed to a fine white line across his front.

The King of Camelot and his knights were heading back home after a routine hunt and patrol duty.

Elyan had begun the show-and-tell by showing the burn mark he carried on his right forearm from when he had been learning the blacksmith trade from his father. After that comment, the rest of them had joined in mentioning their various scars and injuries. Even Arthur was participating by bragging about the marks he still bore on his chest from the Questing Beast.

Meanwhile Merlin had just continued to clean up the campsite, smiling at their antics.

"What about you Merlin? Got anything to add?" Arthur teased, turning to his servant, already knowing the answer but wishing to give Merlin a hard time anyway. The others caught on rather quickly,

"You want to show us your dry hands from washing dishes?" Leon said jokingly.

"Yeah, maybe some scars on your hands from picking herbs." Perceval added with a snort.

They all laughed and shouted comments, and Merlin just rolled his eyes and like always, remained quiet.

That incident happened only a few days before the festival that was thrown to signal the end of the darkest month of the year.

So enough time hadn't passed for that incident to recede in Merlin's memory, for his subconscious to 'let it go'.

Which is why when Gwaine had the bright idea to get Merlin drunk during the New Year celebration because he thought it would be funny to see Merlin utterly sloshed, things got rather out of hand. Gwaine you see, with help from Elyan, had managed to essentially drug Merlin's drinks. Merlin only drank a few ales but the effect was if he'd had nine or ten. It wouldn't make him sick, it would just make him hilarious, or so Gwaine had thought.

Elyan, Leon, and Perceval were in on it too. Arthur had even seen what they were doing and hadn't stopped them, thinking it would only be harmless fun and something he could later humiliate Merlin with.

Which was why at the end of the night, after Merlin had sung a total of eight ballads, and had giggled at everything anyone had said to him, Merlin insisted on performing his duties as Arthur's manservant.

Arthur had ordered Merlin to go to bed but Merlin had outright refused.

"Na-a…sssmy job…" He had muttered with a large goofy smile and then had run off before anyone could grab him.

"God Gwaine, I ought to have you hanged." Arthur muttered, stalking after Merlin.

Gwaine just laughed and followed Arthur.

"What do you think Merlin's going to do to Arthur's room?" Elyan asked with a chuckle.

"Who knows? I've never seen him this drunk." Leon answered.

"Any damage is coming out of all your pay!" Arthur hollered back, now running in pursuit.

Arthur, Gwaine, Elyan, Perceval, and Leon arrived in Arthur's chambers a little after Merlin. The idiot was sitting at the table, his head propped on his hands, a big joyful smile on his face.

"Merlin, its time for you to leave now." Arthur ordered.

Merlin shook his head, "Don't want to."

Arthur gritted his teeth, "Go now and I'll let you sleep in tomorrow."

"Come on mate, lets get you to bed." Perceval said, striding over with every intent of swinging Merlin over his shoulders and carrying to his room.

"Ah, that's not fair Perce! I never got to play the game!" Merlin exclaimed, his voice as indignant as his expression. Perceval paused and looked back at Arthur who shrugged in response.

"What are you talking about Merlin?" Elyan asked with a smile, the situation was still extremely amusing.

Merlin suddenly stood up, his hands resting on the table..

"I have scars too you know." Merlin said with an little laugh/hiccup. And without further ado Merlin yanked off his neckerchief, set it on the table, and then proceeded to pull off his shirt.

He was thin of course, and his skin was incredibly pale. Surprisingly though, Merlin looked far from weak, and there was a quiet dignity in his stance and appearance that stopped the others for a heartbeat before their eyes honed in on the most obvious blemish on Merlin's pale front.

There was a large burn on the front of his chest where the skin was still tinted red. Merlin strode over to them, his silly smile still on his face and turned around.

Gwaine gasped, Arthur's mouth dropped open, and there were various other intakes of breath because the wound on Merlin's back was nothing like anyone had ever seen before.

The dark wound that had captured their attention was in the middle of Merlin's back, and it would have looked like a very small stab wound except that the skin around it was dark like a bruise and spreading out from the stab-looking wound were long, dark tendrils that looked like vines. The dark vines were black at the center but as they spread out from the wound they got lighter and eventually disappeared, but still…the whole thing took up a large portion of Merlin's back.

Their attention eventually shifted to the other various bruises and scars that littered Merlin's back and front.

"See", Merlin said after a while,

"I've got marks too right?" He swayed slightly and his mouth opened in a yawn.

"How- How did you come by this Merlin?" Gwaine spoke first, motioning to the scar on his back, afraid to touch it.

"It still looks fresh." Leon murmured in assent.

"Naw, that one's old. Serket sting." Merlin replied, his eyes blinking a few more times as the downing effects of the alcohol finally began to take hold.

Arthur, for his part was utterly speechless.

"Nobody lives after a Serket sting." Perceval muttered, his eyebrows raised in surprise.

Arthur met Perceval's eyes and his jaw clentched.

"You sure it was a Serket, Merlin?" Arthur asked, his voice had a hard edge to it.

"Sure was, a huge scorpion…was tied up with magical chains…couldn't get out…couldn't escape…would have died." Merlin answered in between yawns, his expression somewhat vacant.

Arthur shook his head in disbelief.

He couldn't believe it.

How could Merlin have almost died and he hadn't known about it at all? And more importantly, _how_ was he still alive? He opened his mouth to ask another question but Elyan interjected before he could.

"What about the one in front Merlin?" The knight asked, his voice equally serious because of course, he recognized a severe burn mark when he saw one.

They had all realized, simultaneously almost, that the excessive drugs had been all to effective on their friend, and that in this state he had showed them a part himself none of them had ever seen before.

They all suddenly came to the conclusion that here, here was definite proof that Merlin kept things from them.

Hid stuff from them.

Possibly important things.

Important enough that their previously-thought frail companion had acquired severe marks upon his person without any of their knowledge.

Arthur's mind illuminated, and the other's weren't far behind in the realization that the man they had thought was incapable of lying had been deceiving them all along.

They knew a part of Merlin, but they didn't know all of him.

They understood now that they only knew what Merlin had allowed them to know.

Merlin, for his part, was unaware of the gravity of the situation. The most powerful warlock of the age had fallen prey to the same consequences that came from imbibing excessive amounts of alcohol.

"Nimueh shot me with a ball of fire!" Merlin replied loudly, mimicking the gesture of holding an invisible ball and lobbing it at an unseen opponent across the room. It would have been funny if the situation weren't so serious.

"That one hurt." Merlin intoned, his face forming a grimace at the memory.

Arthur refused to let his mouth drop open in surprise.

His mind was already flipping back the years to when Nimueh had been a threat to Camelot. Trying to remember when Merlin had ever gotten attacked by the evil sorceress.

"Where do you find the time to get all these scars Merlin?" Arthur growled, upset that he couldn't remember anything.

Merlin laughed then, he laughed loud and long. His expression was youthful, happy and un-tethered by the concerns he always kept so close to his heart.

"Oh that's funny," Merlin chuckled some more.

"I've done my job so well that no one pays any attention to me!" Merlin exclaimed, his smile still firmly in place. He didn't seem to be pitying himself at all, in fact, it was as if he found the situation truly amusing. His face slowly became less amused as he pondered Arthur's question. Neither the king nor his knights were inclined to speak, rather, for the first time they were content to simply watch and listen. Somehow they were all on the same page, an unspoken agreement to allow Merlin to continue this unintentional moment of truth.

"I find time though. I do." Merlin nearly whispered the last two words, his eyes blinking slowly, the alcohol making his body feel relaxed and tiered, quite tiered.

"What about this one Merlin? The one on your neck?" Perceval asked, his finger lightly touching the black mark on the base of Merlin's neck.

Merlin cocked his head to the side, trying to think through the haze surrounding his thoughts.

"Oh, that one was Morgana…" Merlin answered slowly.

When Merlin added nothing else, Arthur made a noise of incredulity, his countenance changing to a mixture of surprise and annoyance that Merlin thought a statement like that would be a sufficient explanation.

"Is that all your going to say? 'Morgana did it?' " Arthur intoned, his voice going higher with each word.

Merlin made a dismissive motion with his hand,

"I don't like talking 'bout Morgana." He said her name with a peculiar edge that Arthur had never heard.

"But if you _must_ know, when those bandits captured me, they brought me to her and she proceeded to put into my _neck_ a very dangerous version of a snake that controlled me." Here Merlin chuckled,

"She ordered me to kill you." Merlin said, looking at Arthur.

"You're lucky I'm such a rotten assassin."

"You never tried to kill me!" Arthur exclaimed.

Merlin smiled, "I never would Arthur, and I think that I _was_ fighting it, and well luckily, Morgana doesn't know everything about me otherwise Arthur, you would probably be dead by now." Merlin said seriously, accentuating his point with an affirmative nod.

"I don't understand."

"It's a serpent with a few heads, ss' called a Fumaroo- something…and it allows the enchanter to control their victim, give them tasks to perform and the like. The only drawback is that the victim ceases to become himself you see, because after Gaius was able to neutralize the snake to where it wasn't influencing me anymore, I didn't remember anything see? Gaius and Gwen saved me from trying to kill you."

"Wait, wait, _Gwen_ knew about this? She never said anything."

"Well she wouldn't now would she? She'sa a verry gooffriend." Merlin answered with his signature goofy smile.

"So Gaius stopped it then? He fixed you?"

"Nope…not exactly. He tried to cut it out right, but the thing grew its head back! I ended up having to go find Morgana's lair, and kill it at the source!" Merlin clapped his hands together for emphasis, and spoke like he was talking about having to do a particularly tiresome chore. Not at all like he had gone off on his own, sought out Morgana, and somehow managed to free himself from her spell.

The king and his knights were utterly flummoxed.

"How did you do that Merlin?"

Merlin smiled again and shook his head, "Can't tell you. 'Isa secret"

A statement which only increased their curiosity because Merlin didn't have the skills necessary to pull off a quest like that unaided.

"Morgana was surprised for sure." Merlin giggled a little, but quickly grew serious. The mention of Morgana always made him serious.

"She's been spoiled. Morgana cares about nothing anymore except revenge. She has gone past the point of misunderstandings and ill gotten role models. Her heart is desolate and without mercy, I see no remnants of anything that can possibly be saved. She is far beyond my reach now." Merlin began this speech steadily, but his words grew louder with his increasing anger, until finally, at the last sentence he just seemed worn and exhausted. Like a man who has lost a battle. He spoke and his wisdom seemed to shine through his features in a way Arthur had only witnessed a few times.

Also, there were no drunken mistakes in Merlin's speech, although the words themselves seemed to suck the remaining energy out of him.

"Are there any more scars I should know about?" Arthur asked quietly, Merlin's words about his sister having been registered and stored away for further analysis. He recognized that Merlin had been keeping things from him in regards to Morgana as well.

Merlin opened his eyes fully, meeting his king's intent stare.

The servant smiled wistfully.

"Nothing you can see anymore."

The Merlin gave the smallest chuckle, and looked at all his friend's briefly,

"Its funny isn't it? How the worst scars heal perfectly, but the superficial ones mark you forever? I don't care about that one," Merlin motioned to the one on his back,

"And this one doesn't really matter to me anymore either. They don't hurt or anything." Here Merlin looked down at the table, his voice quieter, the last words spoken just above a whisper.

"_They_ don't hurt anymore, but the others do."

Merlin looked back up at Arthur, swaying slightly where he stood.

Arthur waved Perceval away and the king himself stood next to Merlin, and it was Arthur who pulled Merlin's arm across his own shoulders with the intent of helping Merlin walk all the way down to his chambers.

"It doesn't stop hurting no matter how much time passes." Merlin spoke as he and Arthur were making their way out of his rooms.

"No Merlin, no it doesn't." Arthur answered quietly.

The knights they left behind were equally sober.

Gaius was sound asleep when Arthur dragged a half asleep Merlin through the door and up to his room. Arthur made sure Merlin had fully laid down before he moved to leave.

"Goodnight Merlin." Arthur said, turning back slightly only to find that Merlin's eyes were still open.

"'Night Arthur." Merlin said back, yawning again.

On a whim, Arthur walked back over to stand over Merlin, aware that what he was about to do was very wrong.

"Merlin, what's the secret? How do you get out of these situation alive?" Arthur spoke quickly.

Merlin tilted his head, his eyes already starting to close again as Arthur waited, holding his breath.

"Hmm…magic." Merlin yawned before rolling over onto his stomach, masking Arthur's sudden intake of breath.

Then Merlin was asleep.

Arthur could only stare at his sleeping manservant and professed sorcerer.

Arthur could rationalize this.

Merlin was drunk, and surely it couldn't be true…

But there was no hope for it now. Too many things were beginning to add up in Arthur's head.

Too many things made sense now.

Arthur straitened up, his expression determined as he stared hard at his manservant…his friend, sleeping on his small bed in Gaius's chambers.

If there was anything Arthur was sure of, the only thing that had remained that he was absolutely certain of was that he trusted Merlin.

Despite all the previous betrayals, and despite the turmoil Arthur was facing now, that fact still remained.

Where once he would have brushed off Merlin's confession, because he could have never pictured Merlin having magic. Now all he could say was,

"I believe you Merlin."

Then Arthur, the King of Camelot, turned away and went back to his chambers, determination in his every step.

Tomorrow, tomorrow he was going to begin fixing those scars Merlin carried.

After he enacted a little payback of course.

Merlin _would not_ be sleeping in tomorrow.

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><p><strong>Reviews are loved like precious teddy bears. :D<strong>

**Thanks for reading!**


	5. Another Way

**Hi guys,**

***NO Spoilers***

**Well, it's been awhile but that's the reason I decided to post this story. So I could come and go as I pleased. I've always been a huge fan of Merlin since I watched the first two seasons on Netflix in about a week before the third season came out. After that, every year I waited for the new season, and during the season, every episode would drive me completely crazy, in the best way. I would scream, laugh, and cry with these characters. I love this show so much, and my incredible sadness at its ending has led me back here. I know everyone is going miss Merlin as much as I will, so let's all go on for a while as if season 5 never happened (or at least the last episode), so here we are.**

**I wrote this a LONG time ago. It's set after season three...yeah, season 3. Anyway, it's just a little thing about how things could have turned out if everyone wasn't dumb. It's a Merlin/Morgana one. Yay. I should have the second part up in a week or so. **

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><p>"Sister, you look exhausted, have you been having trouble sleeping?" Morgause asked her, a concerned look on her face.<p>

Morgana turned around and smiled briefly. It had been a month since their immortal army had been destroyed…a month since she had almost lost her sister, her best friend and her reason for living.

Morgana did not know how she had been able to transport them back to the castle on the Isle of the Blessed, but somehow she had managed. Once there she had went to find someone who could heal her sister. That man had been a Druid, but it had taken a whole week before her sister had been able to open her eyes. Morgause had then explained what had happened, how Gaius, of all people, had surprised her and thrown her to the floor using magic. She had managed to recover and retaliate, she had had Gaius on his back and had been about to kill him when somehow she had been thrown again, this time into the wall and her head had smashed against the pillar. It would have been a mortal wound if Morgana had not found the Druid healer.

Morgana shook herself from her musings, "I'm alright sister, but I _am_ tired. I think I'll go to bed."

Morgause nodded, running a hand down Morgana's hair in affection, "Good night then." She murmured before exiting the room.

Morgana turned back to her image in the mirror. Ever since Morgause had been healed, Morgana had been feeling weird. She should be happier that her sister was alive, and she should be busy with her, plotting her revenge against Camelot. She _was_ angry, furious even, that Merlin had spoiled her plans again ,and had somehow managed to empty out the cup. How he kept winning was a mystery to her and for the life of her, she could Not. Figure. It. Out.

There was that and the fact that the Druid healer kept looking at her in a way that made her feel more than a little uneasy.

Suddenly, she felt the day's length get to her; she could feel her eyes closing in sleep. She stumbled as she made her way over to her bed before falling in it, her hand knocking over a vase with flowers on the nightstand. The sound alerted Morgause who wasn't far from her door. The blonde sorceress came running, but it was too late. Morgana could not be woken.

Morgana's eyelids felt heavy. She was on her back on a bed, and she was feeling a weight on her middle, a pressure she couldn't identify. Something felt wrong; she knew she wasn't in her bed because the position was off. The weight that had held her eyelids shut lifted, and she sat up quickly with a gasp, her head spinning with dizziness. The room was still dark but she would recognize it anywhere, she was back in Camelot. Was this some weird dream? If it was then why wasn't she in her old room?

Morgana felt panic well in her chest, and her breathing accelerated dramatically.

Then the door opened, a figure outlined in the darkness. Light streamed in and her mouth dropped when she saw who was standing there.

"Morgana? Are you alright, I felt your distress and I came as quickly as I could." He came over and sat on the bed beside her, grasping her hands in a familiar gesture. Morgana was too shocked too say anything, speechless for once in her life.

"Was it just a nightmare or did you see something?" He touched her face, his expression growing more concerned as she continued to gape at him.

"Is it the baby? Should I fetch Gaius?" He asked again, his voice growing more frantic.

Finally, Morgana found her voice,

"Merlin?" She whispered.

Merlin frowned at her when she said his name like that, calling himself all kinds of stupid for leaving her this morning. He knew strange things could happen to her when she was pregnant. He pushed his magic out; searching for Gilli who he knew was with Gaius and asked the young man to have Gaius come quickly.

Morgana studied Merlin, certain that this was an elaborate dream or a trick of some sort, because no matter how real this felt she knew that it could not be so. Merlin didn't seem to see that obvious truth however, as he was still looking at her, that all to fake concern on his face. As if he could ever care for her!

He looked different. His hair was a little longer; the dark locks curling up slightly beneath his ears. He had facial hair now too, growing in the specific areas of his chin and upper lip, making him look older and even more handsome. She also noticed his wardrobe. He wasn't wearing his usual dowdy peasant clothes, but instead had on a fine blue shirt with gold patterns on the collar and the cuffs of his sleeves. His pants were dark and also of fine quality. His trademark neckerchief was absent and she could see the pale expanse of his throat.

"Morgana, love, talk to me please." Merlin pleaded.

Her mind honed in on that word, _what had he just called her? Love. He had called her his love_. She felt warm, too warm. She promptly began extracting herself from the mound of covers, wanting to put some distance between her and this- this man who looked like Merlin, but who obviously _wasn't_, because the Merlin she knew hated her, and the feeling was mutual.

She practically launched herself out of the bed, but her head was still spinning and she felt oddly off-balance and before she realized she felt herself swaying. Before she could fall Merlin was there beside her, his arms around her, holding her close. Her face was buried in his shirtfront, just under his chin.

To her horror, she heard a sob escape her throat and then she was crying. Crying on Merlin's chest, clutching him to her because even though she was confused and scared, he was familiar, and when no one else had been able to see through her disguise, he always could.

"Shh, it's alright, I've got you." He murmured, stroking her hair, and she felt him kiss her head. What in the world was going _on_?

"What's hap-happening to me?" She sniffled sounding absolutely pitiful, even to her own ears. Merlin continued to stroke her hair and say reassurances that she could barely hear over her sobbing.

She continued to cry, even when their door opened and a familiar voice filled the room,

"What's happened? Is Morgana okay?"

Gaius. She couldn't stop crying though, sniffling against her archenemy's chest.

"I dunno Gaius, I felt that something was wrong and I came up here. She won't talk to me and she's just started crying. I don't know what I'm supposed to do!" He spoke frantically, his chest moving with each word. She heard Gaius sigh,

"Well for one, it's entirely too dark in here, open the curtains and let me see her."

Then she heard Merlin say something, soft words, old words that carried power. Tears still in here eyes she looked up at him in confusion, just in time to see his eyes turn gold and then the curtains rolled back and light flooded into the room.

No.

_No, no, no, no, no_.

She stepped away from him, feeling like she was in a daze her hand going reflexively to rest on her stomach. That's when she felt it. She looked down in disbelief at her protruding stomach. So _this_ was the heaviness in her middle she observed, she felt like laughing but instead she made a hysterical sort of sound, not quite a scream but certainly an exclamation of some sort.

And even though the Lady Morgana had never once fainted in her _entire_ life, the sight of Merlin doing magic coupled with this impossibility did it for her. Her eyes rolled back into her head and she went limp in Merlin's arms.


	6. Another Way PtII

**AN:/ I know it's been forever...but I had to put all my Merlin feels in a tiny locked box for awhile. But now that I'm pretending the last season didn't happen, things are getting easier.**

**I was going through my stuff and found this. I think I'll try to finish this one anyway. **

**IMPORTANT: I wrote this before season 4 came out so Morgana has just recently been turned evil. She's not the hardened badass bitch yet, so that's why she's a bit more vulnerable and less I'm-going-to-cut-out-your-heart. Anyway. It's not that edited so yeah...sorry for mistakes.****  
><strong>

**Another Way Pt. II**

"Honestly Merlin," She heard Gaius exclaim. She felt that she was back to lying on the bed, a hand was feeling her forehead. She must have only been out a couple of minutes. Morgana had hoped to wake up back in reality but she knew immediately that it was not so. Still, she kept her eyes closed, unwilling to accept that she was _pregnant_ and Merlin was quite possibly the father.

"Your wife is pregnant, not ill. This type of stuff is completely normal. There is no need to fly off in a panic."

She was also married. Pregnant and Married…. with and to Merlin, who also had magic. She stopped trying to make sense of the situation. She opened her eyes to see both Gaius and Merlin peering anxiously at her.

"Morgana, thank the gods, how are you feeling?" Merlin asked, helping her sit up, her back against a mound of pillows. Her hand went to rest against her stomach again, it was quite large, and she must be at least seven months or so. She looked up at Merlin again, thinking that maybe she should say something now; he _did_ look very worried about her.

"I- I, I'm fine Merlin." She spoke, her voice wavering. Merlin let out a breath and smiled a dazzling smile right at her. His eyes looked so bright, staring at her with adoration. The sight of him took her breath away, those all too familiar repressed feelings about him blooming suddenly, making her face flush.

"Morgana, are you sure your alright?" Gaius asked. She could only nod, her eyes still locked with Merlin's. Her eyes broke from his only when the door opened again and Gwen, of all people strode in.

Her worried expression was the first thing Morgana noticed. Then the fact that she had on a beautiful purple dress, and on her head rested a crown. The same crown that she herself had worn only a month ago. She sat up more, startled, Merlin's hand still holding hers.

"Morgana!" Gwen exclaimed with relief, seeing her best friend sitting up. She had been worried that Morgana was sick but the woman only looked a little pale. She stood by her bedside and grabbed the other hand that Merlin wasn't holding.

"I know these last months are wretched, why don't you let me help you dress this morning?" She asked, her eyes shinning with warmth. Morgana hadn't remembered the last time her old friend had looked at her that way. It was more than a little comforting.

"But – Gwen, you're- you're Queen!" Morgana squeaked out the last word. Gwen laughed, "Yes, but I'm still your friend, and you look like you could use one. So why don't you let me help you, and Merlin, if you could please go back down and see to Arthur, he really is worried about the harvest this winter." Gwen ordered. Merlin rolled his eyes and huffed,

"I've _told_ him-"

Gwen cut him off, "Nevertheless, he is still concerned and you need to go reassure him." She replied calmly. Merlin nodded before turning to her with a smile,

"Your brother seems to think I can't do my job, you'll be okay now right?" He asked, watching her carefully for any sign that it wasn't. Morgana smiled at him,

"I'm fine Merlin."

Then, in an almost unconscious way, he leaned forward and kissed her. Right on her lips. It was so unexpected that instead of freezing, his soft lips beckoned a response from her, and without thinking she pressed her lips more firmly against his, kissing him back. The kiss lasted longer than a mere peck, and it had an instant affect on Morgana…it sent her head spinning, and not in a bad way.

Gwen interrupted with a soft cough. Morgana pulled back with a jolt, startled at her own audacity but Merlin just winked and her and she felt herself blush under his gaze.

"Arthur also keeps mentioning that little love potion incident…" Gwen trailed off, undisguised mirth in her voice. Merlin broke eye contact with her and shot off the bed,

"Oh for the love of- _how_ many times do I have to tell him that I can _fix_ it?" Merlin declared loudly, as if Arthur could hear him, before practically running out of the room.

Morgana stared after him in shock. A love potion gone wrong that _Merlin_ was going to fix? How could he- oh, that's right…he had magic. Gwen was talking to her but Morgana couldn't seem to process anything. All she knew at this point was that she was feelings things she ought not to be feeling, and that nothing was the way it was supposed to be, and she couldn't figure out how to make it right.

After a moment's contemplation, while Gwen rattled on about things, Morgana decided that she wasn't going to get anywhere if she didn't even try to understand what was happening or figure this new world out.

This could be some elaborate spell aimed at making her crazy, or getting inside her head. Well if it was, she wouldn't give in without a fight. If information was power (which she knew it was) then she was just going to have to get some.

She took a breath, already feeling better; having a plan gave her a sense of calm. She would find out who she was in this world and _then_ figure out how to get out, and as Morgause was probably already working on it, she would just have to ride out the confusion, learn as much as possible and attempt to not loose her mind to this insanity.

She felt herself take another deep breath, steeling herself again to play her role.

"Morgana, which dress would you like to wear today?" Gwen asked motioning for a young maid, who had just walked in, to open the closet door. Morgana smiled, as genuinely as she could manage,

"Whatever you think will fit over _this!_" She replied, faking a chuckle. As Gwen laughed Morgana ran her hand over her stomach again, slowly marveling. Her and Merlin's baby was in there. A sudden feeling of excitement came over her, wondering if it would be a boy or a girl. Would it have her eyes, or Merlin's lovely blue ones? Would Merlin maybe kiss her again when he saw her next? She would have to ask him about his magic…maybe he would do some more? For some reason Merlin doing magic just made her feel…Oh.

Oh crap.

Maybe this was going to be more difficult than she anticipated?

"What the hell was that Merlin? I was just in the middle of a report!" Arthur asked loudly, his voice carrying across the hall as he watched as his Official Court Sorcerer re-entered the great hall. Merlin rolled his eyes good naturedly, and got a wink from Gwaine as he passed by to take his place at the Round Table on Arthur's right hand side.

"Morgana needed me." Merlin said simply. Arthur gave him an exasperated look but didn't comment. The meeting progressed as planned, Arthur discussing things with the others that he had already told Merlin, or that Merlin had told him. Really, there wasn't any reason he had to be here…besides the fact that he knew Arthur wanted him there (Arthur had explicitly told him so countless times, in roundabout ways, that he was required to be at _all_ the meetings), so logically, his mind wandered, and it wandered strait to Morgana.

Morgana was never far from Merlin's thoughts. He was twenty-seven now and although he and Morgana had technically only been married for four years, they had been together for almost the entirety of the seven years he's spent in Camelot. They were so attuned to each other at this point that even a nightmare had him up and running. At least, he hoped that it was a nightmare and not a vision that she thought she could hide from him. But no, Morgana didn't usually keep stuff from him so it must have just been a nightmare.

He felt a twinge of guilt, if he had been with her it wouldn't have happened, but he had gotten up early to go down to the lower towns and check the crops. This unusual summer heat was wreaking havoc and it was all he could do to keep them alive and able to produce. He had to go down every morning as it was. Morgana had assured him of her understanding, she knew that what he was doing was necessary, but it still grated on his nerves. He _wanted_ to spend time with her, she was his first love and his best friend, (Arthur was second in that regard only to her) and he missed waking up in her arms.

He looked absently around the table, noting the two empty seats, one on Arthur's left that belonged to Gwen, and the other next to him where Morgana usually sat. If she were here right now she'd be teasing him, nudging his foot with her own, entwining their hands under the table, or playing some sort of magical game of her choosing. Once, due to an unfortunate accident, their game had involved creating small illusions that the other had to spot and change, was brought to everyone's attention and Arthur had been less than pleased (although both Merlin and Morgana suspected that he had just been cranky because he knew he couldn't play their magical games).

"Merlin…are you paying attention?"

Arthur's sharp voice shook Merlin out of his musings and he looked at the man who was his king, and his best friend. Arthur trusted Merlin implicitly, despite the fact that Merlin had lied about his magic and Merlin was very proud of the young man who was glaring at him. Ah well, some things never changed.

"Of course I am sire." He replied, almost automatically. All eyes turned to Merlin, whose chair was tilted back, its front legs completely off the floor, held there unconsciously by magic. Merlin noted the amused glances, and Gwaine's snort at his subtly sarcastic reply to Arthur's query.

King Arthur had ceased to be intimidated by Merlin's power (most of the time anyway), so he raised his eyebrows in a very Gaius move,

"Then what did I just say?"

Merlin's eyes widened, his chair rather abruptly slamming back down.

"I- uh."

Arthur grinned in victory.

Great, Merlin thought, just great.

Morgana had finished dressing at this point, listening to Gwen prattle on, and she honestly tried to pay attention but her mind kept wandering. Gwen left the room to get something, Morgana didn't hear… Her thoughts kept going back to Merlin and his magic. At first she had come to the conclusion that it was just a dream, that Merlin didn't have magic in the real world. He _couldn't_ have magic, it was an impossible thought and yet… The more she thought about it the more things started making sense. If Merlin did have magic it would certainly explain a lot of things and as she thought back on the past, everything just kept getting clearer. Merlin had poisoned her because he had known she was the source of the sleeping spell, but how had he known that? Gaius had been asleep that time so he couldn't have helped.

Suddenly a bunch of other instances began coming back, Merlin always next to Arthur, the two of them coming back from seemingly impossible odds, especially when she had actively been trying to bring down Camelot and her plans had always been unsuccessful. She had always wondered how powerful sorcerers, including her sister now, always managed to fail in their attempts. If that had all been Merlin…

Why though? She was so confused at this turn, too confused to even be angry. Her insides felt twisted as memory after memory of Merlin trying to help her, especially those moments in Camelot's crypt with the staff…

"_You don't have magic Merlin, you can't begin to understand."_

"_If I had your powers I would harness them for good, that is magic's true purpose."_

"_We can find another way…"_

"_There is no other way"_

Morgana closed her eyes. Merlin had been trying to save her. Why didn't he just tell her? Things could have been… Morgana's head shot up in realization.

"Different." She murmured, meeting her own eyes in the mirror of her vanity where Gwen had been fixing her hair.

"Things could have been different." She spoke slowly. Could this be what she was experiencing? A different world where her and Merlin had fallen in love?

As she looked in the mirror the image suddenly shifted, and a face began to appear on the surface. Morgana jumped back with a soft cry of surprise.

"Bingo my lady, that is exactly what this is." The face spoke to her, its lips moving but its voice sounding in her head. The face was not yet clear, too blurry still to make out although the voice sounded familiar…

"Where am I? Is this a dream?" She asked quietly after a moment.

"What's in a dream? You can call it anything you want but where you are now is every bit as real as the place you were before."

Morgana shook her head in confusion,

"That doesn't make any sense."

"It isn't supposed to make sense to you yet. Your journey has just begun." It answered her, its voice impatient.

"Why have you brought me here? I demand that you release me from this enchantment!" Her voice rising with each harsh word.

"No one can release you Morgana. Only you can do that."

Morgana rolled her eyes, "How do I do that?" She asked sarcastically, her level of annoyance with this figure having reached a peak. Morgana never got her answer, for just then sounds could be heard from outside the room, the door opening at the same time as the man's image disappeared.

Her attention turned back to Gwen, plastering a smile on her face, her mind racing with what she had just been told. She was distracted however, by the maid who came in carrying a small boy with blonde curls and deep brown eyes, and holding the maid's hand was a girl, absolutely tiny with enormous blue eyes and dark curly hair that fell loose to the nape of her neck. Before Morgana could do more than stare the girl had broken away from the maid that held her hand and launched herself at Morgana, burying her face in her neck. Morgana didn't even have to ask, she had only gotten a glimpse but she knew who this was.

"Estelle, be careful, remember what we talked about?" Her maid said softly moving to pull the child away.

"No." Morgana said clutching the child closer,

"She's fine here."

The maid nodded and moved to leave the room.

Morgana could only breathe, inhaling the soft baby scent of her daughter and attempt to absorb this most recent event that had left her reeling.

Would the surprises never cease?

Morgana pulled the girl away slightly so she could take a good look at her, marveling at the large sky-blue eyes that were an exact copy of Merlin's. Then Morgana smirked slightly, Estelle may have her father's eyes but she sure looked a lot like her mother.

"How old are you?" She whispered so Gwen couldn't hear, clutching her daughter's tiny hand in her own. The child blinked and held up two fingers, smiling in her achievement. Estelle was wearing a small little blue dress, lighter than the one Morgana herself was wearing.

"She gets more adorable every day." Gwen laughed. The boy in her arms waved his arms and let out a cry. Gwen tsked,

"I know your hungry Rion, no need to shout." Gwen said with a smile.

"Just like his father then?" Morgana replied without thinking but Gwen just laughed,

"Oh, that's good. Remind me to tell Merlin that one." Gwen said, still giggling. Morgana laughed with her, caught up in the moment.

"We should go down for breakfast, I'm sure the meeting is over by now."

Apparently big "family" breakfasts happened once a week, Morgana reflected wryly a few hours later. Although family was a loose term in this sense as many other of Arthur's trusted knights and council members were there too. She had noticed that Uther wasn't there, and she had wanted to ask but she hadn't wanted to appear too obvious. Also, the moment she arrived in the Great Hall, with Estelle clinging to her skirts, she had been accosted by Merlin.

The man had merely kissed her in front of _everyone_ before picking up Estelle, and kissing the child on her on her cheek. She had tried not to act shocked but when she got over her mortification she was sitting in a chair right next to Merlin, who had placed Estelle on his lap and was entertaining her by levitating the plates and silverware. Their daughter crowed with glee, her smile wide and her hands clapping together each time something floated off the table.

Arthur sat at the head of the table, Gwen on his right, Merlin on his left and Morgana seated between Merlin and Gwaine. She remembered who he was but she hadn't realized that he was apparently this important. He treated her like they were friends…even going so far as to flirt with her! Merlin had merely rolled his eyes and given her a smile. That particular smile she had seen before as he had given it to her this morning. It was like they were sharing their own private joke, and when he smiled like that his eyes lit up. Morgana felt her unwilling heart flutter in response to his smile and for the life of her; she had absolutely no idea _why_ it kept doing that.

She had also not realized until she had been served how incredibly hungry she was. She consumed two plates of food and three thick slices of bread and she felt absolutely appalled that being pregnant had effectively turned her into some sort of food monster…a devourer of morsels. Then to her absolute horror once, when she and Merlin had locked eyes once she found herself thinking that it wasn't fair that she was pregnant since she hadn't even had the memories of how she had gotten this way…_twice_ mind you. Then she had realized exactly what she had been wishing she could remember, and felt disgusted with herself. How could she even be having these feelings for Merlin? It was absurd! Even when she had _liked_ him she hadn't liked him in that way. This world was getting inside her head and she had no idea how to stop it.

It didn't help matters that she had fallen in love with Estelle immediately upon seeing her, or that the little girl completely adored her father. Watching them together was heart wrenching because she knew that this wasn't real, that Estelle wasn't real. And Morgana found that thought incredibly sad. Also, Arthur, Gwen and their son were heartwarming and Morgana saw how in love they were. She also realized that Arthur knew and accepted Merlin's magic and he also accepted that Merlin had married his sister and Merlin was not a noble. His knights weren't noble either for that matter. In this world it seemed Arthur was the complete opposite of Uther and everything he had stood for.

A large part of her chalked this Arthur up to being apart of this "dream", but there was a small part…a persistent nagging part of her that kept going back to what that man had said, that this wasn't a dream, just an alternate form of events unfolding and people taking different paths. If this was true…then it was only herself who was different. That maybe Arthur really did have this potential, that maybe he could have been persuaded to support magic. To support her.

"I believe you've had her long enough Merlin, I get to hold her now." Arthur said, breaking Morgana out of her reverie. The king had turned toward Merlin and had plucked Estelle from Merlin and sat her in his lap. Estelle seemed put off for a few seconds but she quickly settled up against her uncle and continued to munch on the bread roll she had clutched in her hand. Gwen rolled her eyes, but she leaned over and ran a hand over Estelle's hair.

"Hmm…you have your own son you know." Merlin remarked dryly.

"Yes and I love him very much." Arthur replied quickly, smiling in his son's direction. The baby boy was being held by the same maid who had brought the children, she was seated next to Gwen and busily bouncing the little prince up and down to keep him quiet.

"But this is my niece, and she is the most beautiful girl in the world." Arthur said in a playful child voice, making Estelle giggle.

"I get to be next then." Gwaine remarked, taking a sip of what he assumed was ale. When he realized it wasn't, that it was actually a cider completely devoid of alcohol he frowned. Merlin shook his head and leaned over to whisper in her ear,

"Arthur's been making Gwaine stick to the new rule- no drinking before the afternoon. He's not been taking it well."

As he spoke his voice and sent washed over her and his soft amused exhales of air gave Morgana goosebumps and she couldn't help but smile covertly, keeping her face turned away from Gwaine lest he see their amusement.

"You look beautiful by the way." Merlin continued "And I missed you at the meeting, Arthur kept chiding me for not paying attention. If you were there you could have burned off his eyebrows or something." He muttered, his voice turning petulant.

Morgana laughed out loud drawing nearby attention. Arthur look over at her in puzzlement before, with a look at Merlin, he seemed to piece together that Merlin had somehow insulted and/or insinuated the use of magic against him and he narrowed his eyes in his characteristic I'm-on-to-you look. Merlin just shot him his innocent, guileless smile that just had Arthur looking more suspicious.

The whole affair took over an hour and after it was over Arthur went with Gwen and Rion to their chambers where he would change for training. Apparently Merlin was still acting as Arthur's manservant in some capacities because Arthur turned to Merlin before he had left saying,

"Be there in fifteen minutes Merlin, don't be late."

To which Merlin had muttered an affectionate "Prat."

Morgana would have asked about this. She would have asked about a lot of things by now if she hadn't been so worried that her lack of knowledge would give her away. So when Merlin, having regained Estelle back from Arthur and helped her out of her seat, he then escorted them both back to their chambers.

"You've been quiet today, are you still tiered from this morning?" Merlin asked her. Estelle was walking alongside her mother, again keeping one hand firmly enwrapped in Morgana's dress. Morgana blinked,

"Uh, um, yes, yes I'm still tired." She spoke softly. Merlin's face showed only understanding as he opened the door for them to precede him inside.

"Morgana do you want me to take Estelle back to the nurse?" Merlin asked, his hand on her back.

Upon entering Estelle ran right over to an area in the corner with a large chest. Without even touching it the heavy trunk opened, the lid thumping softly against the wall. Morgana started, her eyes showing her obvious surprise.

"She- she can do magic? _Already_?"

Merlin tilted his head and gave her an odd look that had her biting the inside of her cheek.

"It still surprises you? She's rather adept at moving objects already, not quite as easily as I was able to at that age but still…" He had a reminiscent look in his eyes as Morgana stared up at him.

She tried not to let her mouth drop open,

"You- you- um… moved stuff like that when you were two?" She asked softly.

"Uh, before that actually. Are you still worried about her? Don't be, I promise I've already begun showing her how to control it. Accidents like what happened last week are to be expected trust me, this is all perfectly normal."

This seemed like an old speech meaning they must have had this conversation before. Wait, he mentioned an accident, what accident? She opened her mouth to ask but shut it quickly. He was already suspicious; asking such an obvious question probably wouldn't be a good idea.

She watched as Estelle reached into the chest and took out a few wooden toys, which she immediately sat down and began playing with. Morgana then watched as Merlin, with a wave of his hand, sent the blanket that had been folded on a trunk at the foot the bed, flying across the room where it unraveled and slowly spread out on the floor. Then he smiled and raised his hand again and their daughter and her toys, slowly levitated from where she had been sitting on the stone floor and onto the blanket her father had laid out for her. During her trip she had squealed with glee and looked over at Merlin with the widest smile,

"Gain Papa!" She laughed, her arms lifted over her head.

Morgana still couldn't believe how effortlessly Merlin used his magic, and apparently he had been doing it since before he was two. She didn't see, didn't understand how she had managed to miss this. He _wasn't_ a very good liar and yet he had been able to hide the biggest secret of his life right under their noses.

How did Morgause not sense Merlin's magic?

Yet here he was levitating items as easily as breathing. It had taken her months to learn how to do that simple spell on a book let alone an actual person. Merlin having magic, and powerful magic at that, it was unthinkable. She needed to learn more, but how could she do that without attracting suspicion? Her eyes fell on the mirror.

"Love, I'd better go see to Arthur before he has a royal tantrum. He's already cross with me as it is."

"He did seem a little more temperamental than usual."

Merlin rolled his eyes, "I made him a little angry this morning, nothing out of the ordinary I suppose."

Morgana laughed. Merlin turned to face her and took her hands in his.

"You'll be okay with her then?" He asked. Morgana nodded,

"Of course, we'll be fine. If I need help you know I know how to ask for it."

Merlin nodded and gave her a smile and a quick kiss before bolting out the door. Morgana sighed and turned and looked at her daughter, who was quietly murmuring to herself while playing with her toys before quickly making her way over to her vanity. She sat down and stared into mirror.

And stared.

And stared.

God, this was infuriating! She took a breath in frustration.

"Okay, listen here, I don't see how I'm supposed to learn anything when I can't ask any question and I have _no idea what's going on_!" She hissed at it, stealing a glance to make sure Estelle was still playing with her toys. She was.

When she turned back around the mirror was again filled with the image of the blurry face she was beginning to grow accustomed too.

"What do you wish to learn My Lady?" It asked, its voice sounding in her head.

"Let's start with her shall we? I have a daughter who is two and I have no idea how she came to be yet I feel…connected to her already. And Merlin… why is it that I have these feelings for him now when I never have before." Morgana angrily hissed at him, her eyes blazing. The figure said nothing for a few moments and when he opened his mouth it was to voice the words of a spell, he was speaking too quickly for Morgana to understand but she felt her head spin and her vision blurred. A feeling of nausea as it felt like she no longer had her feet on solid ground.

It felt longer than it was and after a moment her vision cleared. She knew where she was the moment she was able to open her eyes; she'd been there often enough after all. Morgana was standing in a prison cell in Camelot's dungeon. She had no idea why she was there but there was a familiar girl sitting in the corner and she did not seem to see her.

"What am I doing here?" She asked warily.

"You wanted to know right? Just pay attention."

So Morgana did.

* * *

><p><strong>I'm almost finished with the next part, so hopefully it should be up in a week or so. <strong>

**As always, thanks for reading and thoughts are appreciated. **

**-LL**


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